Sunday, December 28

What's in Your Emotional Suitcase?



Do you have a child who drives you crazy? Does your child continually annoy you?  No, probably not.  But, do you annoy YOURSELF when you don't show them the grace and love that God shows you?   
A simple daily activity like math can be a reminder of the fear of failure you felt as a child.   Sometimes we snap and bite at our kids not because they deserve it, but because we have unresolved anger and bitterness that is triggered by something they do.  Our own hurts are hurting our children and their children... and their children.

It is critical that we “come clean” of the hurts and hostilities that still live within us. The things that we’ve done or had done to us are not who we are and they don’t have to continue to cloud our world . If we allow ourselves to accept that God is “crazy about us” then we can truly forgive those who may have caused us emotional damage. Jesus came that we may have life “to the full,” not to the half. Don’t let him take over half you heart, give it all to him.

How can you let go of hurts? Hurts like abuse, rape, feelings of inadequacy, or a lack of love from parents or a spouse.   Some of us may need to seek out a Christian counselor to get deeper into the root of our problems.  Some may not even know they have hurts affecting their behavior.  Here is one way to begin the healing process:
  • Go to your Father, your Creator, in quiet. Let him search your soul for the roots of bitterness, anxiety, anger or fear. 
  • Ask God to show you what needs to be let go. 
  • Listen with paper and pen in hand. Write down what comes to your head. Write until nothing else comes. 
  • Read that list.  (If it is too weighty for you alone, seek a counselor.)
  • Face what is on it.  Forgive and let yourself be forgiven!
These are the things you don’t want to pass on to your children. But, sadly, we contaminate our kids lives with the things we carry around, like old luggage full of clothes that don’t fit. Those old things don’t benefit us and they damage the love between parent and child.

We must also forgive ourselves for not making the most of all of our opportunities. Every day is an opportunity and every opportunity a chance to shine for God. Perhaps we are pushing our children to be who we feel we are not.

People are not perfect, God IS perfect. The love of Christ is perfect. It surpasses anything we can imagine, but we can feel it and know it deeply and in a healing way.

Proverbs 14:10
“Each heart knows its own bitterness, and no one else can fully share its joy.”

God is crazy about you
How do we know? 
God wants us to know truth. 
He is incapable of lying. 

This is what Your God says (paraphrasing mine):

John 3:16

“For God SO LOVED the world
  • (you and every person in it)
that he sent his only begotten Son
  • (the Word, present at the time of creation, who changed form to become human and experience our every temptation)
so that whoever believes in Him
  • (accepts his gift of love, trusts him in their every moment)
will not perish
  • (nothing can take you away from him)
but have eternal life.
  • (an abundant life which gets more incredible day by day, and even improves at death, when we come into the the light radiating from a God so holy and loving that we will be overcome with joy and completeness.)

Talk with your children.  Ask for their forgiveness for times when you've been unjust. Don’t invite them into all the hurt and restate it for them, just let them know you had some troubles and that Jesus sets us free because he shows us how to forgive.  Your kids are not your enemy.   Satan is your enemy and he'll use whatever bitterness is left in you to pass misery onto future generations.  

You have the keys to that jail cell, now let yourself out!
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Inspired by "The Mentoring Mom: 11 Ways to Model Christ for Your Child" by Jackie Kendall. I highly recommend this book to all who want to show your children a pattern that leads to a life walk with God.

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